a moment to remember

~songs in my head~

没有地球太阳还是会绕.

But I don’t care what they say. I’m in love with you.

I just wanna fall and lose myself Laughing so hard it hurts like hell Forget about everything and run away, yeah

~ MOTTO ~
:: if you have tried your best, there's no need for regrets. ::

~ THOUGHTS ~
By ourselves we are too weak to hold our own even for a moment.

"And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God" (Romans 8:28)

For what it's worth, it was worth all the while.

"God has given, God has taken, blessed be the name of God" (Job 1:21)

"I know what I’m doing. I have it all planned out – plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for.” (Jeremiah 29:11)

Hit Counters

:: juz taking a moment to remember ::

Friday, October 31, 2008 1:06 AM

embracing lace... and my new shoes!

Note: due to the P word, this post was meant for last thurs. but i just didnt have the heart to finish it... so what is P??

P = procrastination. what were you thinking?? :D

today is really the most lucky day for me.

it's unbelievable but i received updates that both my oxford boots and nine west inspired boots which i ordered long ago, are here. i was like, wah, both boots at the same time, thats amazing. but i thought about my long due gladiators sandals and felt bit impatient.

then just when i am abt to go to sleep i receive another email telling me the gladiators are gg to be here nx week. so yeah along with them, can collect my also long-due AA stuff... shout H for Hurray!!! 3 shoes at 1 time. that really makes my day/weekend.

so looking for them to reach me in hall nx week. now i have to cross my fingers that the size fits for all. i waited months for these, so they better do. sprees can take forever but sometimes its really worth waiting. :D

will post pictures when i get them!! *Excited!* i am even more anxious for this sem and exams to be over so i can wear my nice clothes and go out. lol. its sad when i see my nice clothes hanging in my wardrobe not being worn. not given the due respect and love they deserve. hahah. seriously, my clothes are begging me to wear them! i have alot of dresses, the last time i count it was erm some xx number. its not reaching xxx anytime soon, but i thk the xx number i have is alot already, considering some of them, i have only worn them once or even zero times. cuz they are too dressy for school and i dont frequent orchard road like i do sengkang.. haha.

i think i should definitely stick to items that will give me mileage but then again sometimes there are certain things that are suddenly trendy and it is the best time to get them esp at cheap prices. i guess what i like about fashion is that its so outrageous and unexpected sometimes, and even more so the fact that fashion is recycled. like say leggings, they were like damn popular awhile back and then it faded but then now it is in the limelight again and in a different style, the lame/leather ones, the shiny nylon ones, the patterned ones, the zebra ones, the geometric ones.. somehow we only dare to rock the plain colored ones, and even so we stick to black or grey, and pink and red are just 'too impractical'. i think we are too safe in our dressing sometimes and we just dont dare to wear things that no one else is wearing which is kind of sad. the one reason why i love to read the angmohs' fashion blogs is because they wear alot of stuff that we dont see in singapore, partly because they have the advantage of having real weather seasons, and also because they have their own styles. we singaporeans are safe dressers. we put on our dress, some bangles and earrings and off we go. but sometimes safe = boring, unless your dress is so unique and special and beautiful, you are not going to look any much different from the many walking dolls out there. i have to admit i tend to dress on the safe side because i dont like lewd attention from the ah peks, stares from the crowds, or the constant little voices in my head making snide remarks. there are lots of stuff that i love that warrants me to be perfect (to live) on the other side of the world, scarfs, stockings, boots, blazers and trenchcoats. but these are also the exact items that are too loud for singapore's everyday or too hot for the weather. sad, sad truth :(

so yeah, moving on... i am in love with lace. am so sad i missed out the lace tunic from f21. i love the lace long sleeves. it looks gothic and like some victorian queen. black lace is sexy and glam while white lace has this pureness and irresistable feminity to it.

and here is the topshop inspired zip dress that jiaen liked so much that she bought it too after seeing me wear.. haha.. really special and i love the zip. i want a dress that has a zip back with lace. that will be perfect. but unfortunately, perfection doesnt always come by chance. it is near impossible to find something that i want exactly from stores. but tailoring it wont be cheap i bet. if only i can sew my own clothes!!

love the lime green platforms. its just very striking.

and these PU boots are the sleekest and hottest boots i have ever seen. looks like those that female secret agents from CIA would wear while spying or acting as undercovers. $16.99USD and there was 20% but i told myself i wouldnt know what to pair these with. its too kick ass. the red soles, the sleek stiletto heels.

quite a nice kimono top though i hate orange clothing usually.

random blog. seeing her long hair, i miss mine!!
why is it taking so damn long?

and before i lose patience and save this entry as a draft again, i shall attempt to end it with some pictures of blake lively aka serena from Gossip Girl!! i think she/her character really has style and this air of nonchalence that is so attractive. she may not be the prettiest celebrity around but i think sometimes, attitude adds alot more points than just a pretty face.

oh yeah i wanted to say... one of the 3 pairs of shoes miraculously arrived today! i was so surprised that the spree organiser was so prompt.. she prolly mailed out on Sat if not i wldnt
have got it today.. :) yay! so anyway i tore open the package and there i saw the boots that i have been coveting for so long.. and with trembling hands and a super anxious heart, i tried them on... and they fit just like a glove!! there was even space for my socks.. yeah... and i thought of the many things i wld wear it with... then realised, sadly (ironic huh) that i dont have class tml, nor on wed, nor on thurs... only on friday!! gosh. like no chance to wear it.. i shall show wenxin when she comes back later! exams are coming and i already cant wait for them to be over. no motivation + procrastination = very bad. then again, i wont remember anything even if i start to memorise now.. (excuses, excuses! haha)

last thing, it was our 7th month (or.. as noel says, the start of the 8th month) last saturday! :)

goodbye or see you,
I'll be your best kept secret or your biggest mistake.

Labels: a woman's work is never done, if love wasnt so atrocious I would have stayed blind, whoever invented fashion committed an atrocious crime

0 wore their hearts on their sleeves

Saturday, October 25, 2008 8:49 PM

The 3 Hs - their underlying meanings and associations

Hi, Hello, Hey...

before i say my piece about these 3 words - Hi, Hello and Hey -
just a question to whoever is reading out there.. which of the H word do you use most often on msn/sms? do you start a conversation with HI, say HELLO or go HEY so and so?? i found myself suddenly and randomly thinking about these 3 words and decided that there are some associations with each seemingly fuss-free word that we use all the time... cuz i have also realised that i tend to use them at different occasions and with different friends/people.

here's my take, just for fun :D

Hi - i believe that we say hi to people whom we are not close to... or whom we may not know.. and its a slightly 'formal' or distanced way of casually greeting someone...

we use Hi in scenarios like when we are at a shopping mall and we tend to say to salesgirls 'Hi, do you have this in Small size?' or if we need a favour from a schoolmate 'Hi, do you have a stapler to borrow?'

as such, Hi is a word that i associate with some degree of awkwardness, discomfort and distance. i noticed i tend to say hi to ex-bfs, friends whom i are not close to anymore, and acquaintances if i do have to greet them...

Hello - we say Hello when we are friendly or want to sound friendly >_<> and thus misleading... it may make the other party come across as friendly when he is really just being neutral...

yup.. haha its abit bo liao.. that i actually examine these forms of greetings.. maybe i read too much into such things.. but i think our choice of words, just like body language, sometimes reveal more than we consciously realise...

goodbye or see you,
I'll be your best kept secret or your biggest mistake.

Labels: why must we label everything?

0 wore their hearts on their sleeves

12:54 AM

the future ahead

notice how we use 'tonight' as a future word.
like tonight we are going to the movies.
and not tonight we went to the movies.
so instead, we have to use today we went to the movies.
which i dont quite like cuz it makes it seem like we went to the movies in the day and not in the night.
very very random i know.

but actually also not that random cuz i wanted to start off with
'today i went out with shuen, en and wx...'

so yeah it was a nice catch up but too short too short.. i miss them lots.
i miss going mani pedi with shuen too!! so long nv see her le... and you are right we will stay close in our hearts :)
and pls keep your kids away from our dearest jiaen cuz shes targetting small kids to open saving accounts from the bank that only can borrow coins :D
and i will never trade wenxin off!! haha.. that day she scanned alot of our old photos neoprints and letters i wrote to her in secondary & jc! gosh it was damn hideous plus hilarious plus childish haha.. didnt even rmb the things i wrote. and the photos are like omgosh!! we changed quite abit! esp her la... i thk can blackmail her with those photos hahah..
hearing about shuen and en exchanging conversation abt insurance, financial plans and work stuff, really makes me feel like i am still a small kid. :(
and made me really wanna graduate. esp since i dont have much study motivation
somemore being a student is very powerless, and we dont get much respect and say
we dont have authority, in other words
cuz we are still perceived as kids who have not yet seen the REAL world.

i want to earn $$ and clear my debt.
i want to do something that i would love.
work with people that are nice and friendly and helpful.
i have tot long and hard and i think i wld go to DB to ask for an opportunity and build my career from there.. hopefully i might be able to cross over to advertising and then maybe magazine publishing!! i love smitten magazine and i wanna work there! haha.. or Female.. not CLEO anymore cuz it seems boring. stopped buying it le.. its a pity when i stop reading certain magazines.. like Teenage and Teens (for obvious irrelevance reasons)... but yeah i guess our tastes change as we grow too..
so anyway afterall, DB is a 'familiar' environment and i know i will love the people there
save for some exceptions :D
plus i love the office space too tho the old one was better
dont know how things will work out but yeah we will see...
with fingers crossed.

whoever said growing up (old) is fun? age brings along lots of responsiblities!
darn i am really such a pessimist!! bleh.
gotta start loving life more......
sounds like a macdonald ad huh..
okay time to slp.... too much nonsense.

goodbye or see you,
I'll be your best kept secret or your biggest mistake.

Labels: growing up, i have atrocious friends

0 wore their hearts on their sleeves

Friday, October 24, 2008 1:02 AM

the first of many posts without any image

have been hearing alot of 'ur blog is like a online shopping site like that'... or 'alot of fashion stuff'.. haha.. so this post is without image.... shall just talk about my feelings. which is why i set up my blog for. there may be some self-talking later on so please just ignore them.

so first i must mention i am hooked on gossip girl!!! serena whatever her last name/blake lively is damn hot and okay though she is prolly not the prettiest girl ever but i just like the way she carries herself or at least her character. she looks like an ice queen but she can be so crazy and warm and down to earth. and not to mention, nate is super cute and i love his hair too. why dont i have blue eyes too. i know that life is unfair already, but i still gotta say it out again LIFE IS VERY UNFAIR.

so anyway i really hate myself these days. not literally myself but the fact that i seem to have some perpertual mood swing. up and down, up and down. sometimes i feel very depressed over i dont know what, fyp plus ogd plus studies plus the lousy economy plus my self-esteem plus family etc but other times i can laugh and feel happy. but deep down it seems like i am a wreck. i dont feel truly relaxed. i admit i procrastinate too much and i dont have any motivation and i dont feel encouraged by anything nor anyone to buck up and get my degree over and done with. i feel tired constantly. seems like fatigue and i wonder if theres anything wrong with me. i feel like the real me is hidding somewhere. i remember being happy being relaxed during my internship. everyday was more or less free of worries. 9 to 6 pm work then go back home or go to darling's hse to bliss. somehow life in hall now feels so wreary. it is just a place to stay. another few more mths i will be out of hall out of ntu.. scary, cant believe i spent so much time in uni and hall already. i am growing old, and i fret over it :( and i hate being so skinny and i hate my twig arms. yes everybody has issues with their body. 'skinny' ones like me too. but somehow my appetite has been rather small recently. and i dont like the super full feeling too.. so i dont know how to put on weight in the right manner. i dont want to get osteoporosis next time.

"the opposite of love is not hate, it is indifference"

i saw this sentence today, just in fact, and it makes alot of sense. if we dont love someone who is pursuing us we wont be bothered by him. we will just be indifferent, careless, dont bother. we wont be angry we wont feel a pinch if he gets out of our lives. i think its sad when two people who are so close become indifferent to each other. real sad. its always sad when any relationship ends, whether its for the better or not.

Its late and i should prolly get some sleep. sleep off the dissatisfaction with my life. you know what? i think the solution to all my complaints here is to

1) count my blessings
2) be contented
3) realise how lucky and fortunate i am in areas that others are lacking

such as people who dont have food to eat
people who dont have a place to stay
people who dont have someone to love
people who dont have someone special loving them
people who dont even have clothes to wear
and so on....

i need to really take charge of my life and stop procrastinating, stop living it like there is no tomorrow and really realise that i must grow up now.

and yeah stop being jaded and cynical and so pessimistic

pessimistic leads to procrastinate = me

so there, i said it.. please change.

goodbye or see you,
I'll be your best kept secret or your biggest mistake.

Labels: growing up

0 wore their hearts on their sleeves

Tuesday, October 21, 2008 5:28 PM

fatigue

haven had energy to do much recently, it seems
idle idle and time seems to pass
too fast, too fast...
too much to do but i always feel at a loss like what to start from
even in my dreams, my stress show
i dream of ogd, dream of fyp
sigh. the worse is now i dont look forward to graduating either
cuz of the poor economy
but hmm that means interest rates will be low right
if its so then its a teeny weeny positive for my loan repayment

i dont like october. october last year was a wreck and i almost created another wreck.
i feel that i m always very tired out towards the last few mths of the year.. while jan-june will be smoother as well as more dynamic months. i tend to get opportunities and meet new people in the beginning months of each year.. and then it dies down from july-sept and it starts to feel draggy and lethargic having to 'finish' the rest of the year.. dont know if that makes any sense.

photofunia photos below.. try it out at photofunia.com

this is jia'en okay not me. when i tried my photo it said face undetected. -_-

on the cover of vogue/i wish

i think it wld look more realistic if the title of the magazines was BRIDE hahha..

the shop seems very giordano.

i am on gisele bundchen

am very addicted to fashion blogs.. they give lots of inspiration (but when the moment comes each day to open my wardrobe to choose what to wear, all the ideas seem to escape my mind) and the clothes are nice too. i wish i live in usa man, so many cheap and nice clothes. i especially love fashiontoast.com cuz she does alot of layering with basics from American Apparel and look fab. layering is one tough skill, i either look like i am trying too hard or i just think i look odd.

wear my blazer over a white dress...

like the shoes with red sole! so christian louboutins

over the knee boots.

i want to learn how to sew so i can make simple skirts like these.
i want a zip mini!!

and i love every single pic of this model, she is pretty with amazingly green eyes. the 1st scarf is gorgeous, and the striped blazer too. and i love the makeshift rope swing in the last pic!

i want to get this look too! but i thk i m too short or petite.

these shoes....look at that heel. from aldo btw, makes me love aldo abit more again but the stores in sg dont carry anything like that! :(

love the 1st black dress in the last row

the shoes.

damn hot! the white dress. and plenty of leg.

i kinda like these shoes though they are not my style but its a gung-ho, rocker chic and even S-M like feel to it haha. looks great on rumi. but i thk will fail terribly on me. i shall try it on if i see it in stores

shall stop rambling on... since it seems like i only have negative or pessimistic stuff to blog about..

goodbye or see you,
I'll be your best kept secret or your biggest mistake.

Labels: i have atrocious friends, whoever invented fashion committed an atrocious crime

0 wore their hearts on their sleeves

on repeat mode

Leona Lewis Lyrics

mine

abandoned blog I
abandoned blog II

the past