~songs in my head~
没有地球太阳还是会绕.But I don’t care what they say. I’m in love with you. I just wanna fall and lose myself Laughing so hard it hurts like hell Forget about everything and run away, yeah ~ MOTTO ~ :: if you have tried your best, there's no need for regrets. :: ~ THOUGHTS ~ By ourselves we are too weak to hold our own even for a moment. "And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God" (Romans 8:28) For what it's worth, it was worth all the while. "God has given, God has taken, blessed be the name of God" (Job 1:21) "I know what I’m doing. I have it all planned out – plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for.” (Jeremiah 29:11) Hit Counters |
:: juz taking a moment to remember ::
Wednesday, April 30, 2008 4:08 PM
for laughs  after like almost 5 mths i finally dug out the photos on my hp and collaged them into a photoboard. hahaha.. its really hilarious everytime i see it i rmb how me and en were doing these and worse our photographer, shuen, very 'pei he' us. haha. if the setting looks v familiar, its cuz we took these at breeks changi airport the day before shuen left! and we were waiting for wenxin (i miss u already! sad sad) and shuen u own me the other photos! as you can tell from the photos (i hope!), essentially the story is about how jiaen is horrified cuz she saw that i have a piece of shit stuck up my nose and she very helpfully helps me take it out using our utensils and then we were gloating over it when we got very high cuz of pepper and she decided to feed me what she dug out. wahahah. what a load of crap we tot of. JIAEN IS SUCH A DRAMA!! besides her my acting becomes mediocre. wahaha! -pls note my f21 dress that costs only a FRACTION of the kate moss dress below - :D its not my dress is cheap; its that the one she's wearing is super ex just cuz of two words; kate moss.  goodbye or see you, I'll be your best kept secret or your biggest mistake. Labels: i have atrocious friends, whoever invented fashion committed an atrocious crime 0 wore their hearts on their sleeves 1:59 PM
its times like these that i seem distanced  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l27_6jBq-RE&feature=related Goodbye, my almost lover Goodbye, my hopeless dream I'm trying not to think about you Can't you just let me be? So long, my luckless romance My back is turned on you Should've known you'd bring me heartache Almost lovers always do I cannot go to the ocean I cannot drive the streets at night I cannot wake up in the morning Without you on my mind So you're gone and I'm haunted And I bet you are just fine Did I make it that easy To walk right in and out of my life? this song is sad and so filled with emotion. somehow it reminds me of a friend i was close to a few months ago. and it so happened that i came across this song and i realised that his nick - Goodbye, my hopeless dream - was from this song also. i wonder what/who he is refering to. the song is quite apt. but sometimes i feel a little sad; was i wrong? why is he so cold now; i want to tell him 'see i told u this day would come. no matter how much a guy says he love u, at one point if its not reciprocated, he will stop.' back then he said he wont stop (easily) but then again i guess its true la, it will be selfish and lame to expect him to what continue it for another 2 years wasting his time... but i dont know if hes acting this way because hes really over (if then it kinda proves myself right that guys only get close to u if they are after you, and the friendship fades after feelings are gone), or hes acting this way because theres no other route anyway. was it because i made it so clear that he finally accepted? why do things always have to be so black and white. either friends or lovers. as i grow older, i m starting to feel that the idea of platonic friends (very good platonic friends) is just an ideal and perfect in theory. but in practice, its too hard to draw the lines. i thought i knew him well enough but now i wonder if he was just another one whose words are empty. some endings are just abrupt, its just as if u drive route A to work everyday but one day u find out that they closed the road and now on u have to take another. and that road is closed forever. maybe thats why i never really like the word 'forever' - it is too permanent and we all know most permanent things are no good. like death, like love turned stale, people dont cherish forever. they take it for granted. only treasure the temporary nature of it on hindsight. i am a thinker, and i over analyse things. but sometimes it feels really good to put pen feelings on paper. goodbye or see you, I'll be your best kept secret or your biggest mistake. Labels: why must we label everything? 0 wore their hearts on their sleeves Tuesday, April 29, 2008 4:27 PM
a string of tots All my bags are packed, I'm ready to go I'm standin' here outside your door I hate to wake you up to say goodbye But the dawn is breakin', it's early morn The taxi's waitin', he's blowin' his horn Already I'm so lonesome I could die So kiss me and smile for me Tell me that you'll wait for me Hold me like you'll never let me go 'Cause I'm leaving on a jet plane I don't know when I'll be back again Oh, babe, I hate to go my roomie shes leaving tonight! but her bags are not all packed and i dont know what plane shes leaving on. haha pls sing this song to me k and miss moi please. i wish i cld go to korea too!! but now i have someone i cant bear to leave and shuens back nx week *time flies, so fast from months to 3 weeks to now 1 week!* - pedicure and chinatown okay?? today sucks because my laptop at work died of old age. right when i came to work, it keep restarting by itself. like its possessed. but lucky the IT guy helped me retrieve my stuff. and then i had to go for long meetings with the bimbo involved and she just yada yada yada and i just super cannot stand her, dont know her natural self or not but i dont know how the rest cld just put up with that kind of behavior. keep your kiddish behavior and pls show a more decent side at work. stop yada-ing away and acting cute/bimbo/annoying me with that voice. grrr... doesnt help that i almost fell aslp at the 2nd meeting. dont know why so sleepy today. sigh, if 1 yr later i can come back here to work i might reconsider if shes still here (high possibility) or worse, if shes my direct superior or sth. gross. but what really made my day today was seeing my supervisor's comments. :)) they were really encouraging and positive so i really hope i can do well for PI. get a superb grade for 10 au. anyway i replaced my name with **. haha. April By April, ** has mastered a lot of the key "paperwork" skills that are required of a client service team member. She now writes, quite effectively, both proposals, phase facts and briefs with minimal guidance and supervision. As two client managers, have joined the team and are now working with me on various projects, I have been able to spend little time with ** individually. Our interaction is mostly as a team. She has held her own. Feedback from the other client service team members who have worked with her has been very positive. Finally, from the observations made in her work log, it is clear that ** is learning quite quickly about the finer ins and outs of client servicing that are hard to be taught and even harder to write about! All in all, I am very pleased with her progress, and even more pleased to hear from her that she would like to extend her internship by a month. For the month of May we hope to get her to experience the implementation end of things before she leaves us to go back to school. March Apart from **'s general performance as a member of the client service team which has exceeded expectations. ** has proven herself to be resilient and courageous in tackling challenges even when they come unexpected. One such example was the impromptu presentation she gave to the client. Despite her surprise, she did not let nervousness get the better of her and instead, sought to rise to the occasion to the best of her abilities. Such a quality is valuable for any individual as is her willingness to speak up. Overall, in the month of March, ** has had to exercise a lot more independence and initiative as I was out of town for quite a fair bit. I have found that she has stayed on top of things and in doing so, has demonstrated the increase in her confidence in working with project *****. okay now for random stuff, i have been fascinated with sandals recently. what a change right. but look at that! its sooo alluring. and shoes are really impt, i always notice what ppl wear, and good looking shoes get my attention haha. even if the face is not so good.       the pink bikini somehow reminds me of siting. and the stripes one is pretty.  je'taime. je'taime. je'taime. the nights are good, the days are better. :) its been a long day and i wanna have a gd sleep. thank God i dont have to work on friday. yay! and i m officially out of hall. :( pls get me the room again!! i miss hall life. goodbye or see you, I'll be your best kept secret or your biggest mistake. Labels: a woman's work is never done, i have atrocious friends, whoever invented fashion committed an atrocious crime 0 wore their hearts on their sleeves Friday, April 25, 2008 6:09 PM
hilarious conversation that begun with an ASOS top 下一站有更期待的结局。 I'll be your best kept secret. says (4:31 PM): u got short N2B distance 下一站有更期待的结局。 I'll be your best kept secret. says (4:31 PM): wahhahaha [Sitting Duck]: abcdEfghIjkLmnOpqrstUVwxyz says (4:32 PM): yah 下一站有更期待的结局。 I'll be your best kept secret. says (4:32 PM): N2B distance 下一站有更期待的结局。 I'll be your best kept secret. says (4:32 PM): we call it that 下一站有更期待的结局。 I'll be your best kept secret. says (4:32 PM): ahhahaha 下一站有更期待的结局。 I'll be your best kept secret. says (4:32 PM): as in why the pattern canot rest on the boobs? [Sitting Duck]: abcdEfghIjkLmnOpqrstUVwxyz says (4:32 PM): pattern rest on the boobs?huh then can see neh neh lei upon seeing that i laughed out luckily i managed to control my volume.. if not my colleagues would think i m mad. today the bimbo we cant stand at work actually came up to me and said my creative brief was well written. wahaha. but after that she wanted my help but i told her i m busy. which is true. haha but usually i can squeeze the time out for others. :P friday night! wheee! packing my room tonight. move out tml! :( goodbye or see you, I'll be your best kept secret or your biggest mistake. Labels: a woman's work is never done, i have atrocious friends 0 wore their hearts on their sleeves Thursday, April 24, 2008 8:53 PM
how do you spell PEACE when a couple quarrels before marriage, only two of them suffer but when a couple quarrels after marriage, their children suffer because they are caught in a war they didnt ask to be in, nor can they side anyone they can only watch or listen in frustration and helplessness annoying like jarring music to the ears or visible panty lines to the eyes at times like that they wish they were in town or something far far away from the scene if you had to be embroiled in a war, sometimes u rather be the soldier fighting the war than the helpless family/friend watching people die it i have wondered many times; one day would i behave the same way i am thinking i would never/hope i would never? many times in life we dont have choices. this is one of the times. goodbye or see you, I'll be your best kept secret or your biggest mistake. Labels: why must we label everything? 0 wore their hearts on their sleeves 12:05 PM
Hope dangles on a string like slow spinning redemption Dashboard Confessional - Vindicated Vindicated I am selfish I am wrong I am right I swear I'm right Swear I knew it all along And I am flawed, but I am cleaning up so well I am seeing in me now the things you swore you saw yourself i am angry!!!! cuz i got a freaking big pimple! though its not like last time jc the damn freaking gigantic and obvious one on my cheek (wenxin will rmb this! haha) its still big and its painful i want it to burst but its painful when i squeeze how how its a few more days before my roomie leaves for japan :( two more days before i move out of hall with the envisaged time table nx sem i thk even if i dont stay hall i can survive but living in hall still has its perks late nights and freedom and friends but then again i really think hall life wont be ever the same anymore after we say gdbye to the year 4s. i will miss them, no more bday celebrations and hall events with them i also hardly saw them this sem so it feels like i never get to hang out with them for the last time! i still rmb we were playing vball outside vincez room and always visiting yi zhi's rabbits last sem and yinjie carried the rabbit he/she pee-ed!! ahha all of us were jumping away.. and so many people are also leaving singapore... yinjie going china for 2 years (did u still apply for room? then PJ roomie with who?) and victor also going to norway..... so sad!! in life, changes are the only constant very soon it will be my turn to leave ntu so fast; it seems just yesterday that i stepped into this big compound took 179 to sch of comm and info to take the test and interview and then took 199 to hall 12 getting my 1st room 06-1211 with wenxin. its as if someone took a remote control fast forward everything and now my life is the way it is. so so so much has happened and some things never went the way i expected maybe this is how life is throw u surprises and only on hindsight will u feel like u have grown from the experiences -edit-: my supervisor just said she confirmed with those mo mo ren that its okay for me to extend my internship despite my holiday plan! haha. though this means i have no holidays but oh well, its trade off. and she also said "1 year later pls consider us ah" hahaha.. not they consider me, but i consider them? acty i would really love to come back here cuz the culture n environment all seems good, and their employment benefits are great too; long xmas holidays whereby the office close for 2 weeks, and they have insurance and stuff. but one year is still a 'long' time and they haven never hire fresh grads before, so pay-wise i dont know what they might offer. but if everything is fine i wld love to go back DB! it would be a gd place for me to start from. it just makes me happy that at least i am having such an offer cuz it shows that they find me useful. lol. skully one year later the management change and no1 rmbs this offer. wahah. goodbye or see you, I'll be your best kept secret or your biggest mistake. Labels: a woman's work is never done, why must we label everything? 0 wore their hearts on their sleeves Wednesday, April 23, 2008 5:39 PM
some things never stop haunting i am stressed!! about my internship report which is due 1 mth later and i have no idea how to write 2000-5000 words. i haven even crapped out my elogbook for this book. seriously after the 4th mth here theres only so much u can say or paraphrase so u dont sound like u are repeating haha.. 2 more weeks and i will be going on my 1st date of 2008!!! so anticipating!! its with shuenyun la 6th may okay, i am honored to be the first one. haha. we were talking abt Brazilian wax + pedicure + durian puffs + charles & keith + chewy junior. its just funny how we can talk nonstop like hyperventilating. yesterday i watched Hitman at darling's house. its quite a exciting movie and the plot is good just that its confusing for me cuz they speak damn fast sometimes. the actor timothy olyphant is hot leh, he is 40 years old but still look like that. he looks better botak! haha. i would have thought he is 32 or something. reminds me of the wentworth miller.  and just to satisfy my window shopping needs. plus some things just look better online than in real. esp white clothes. so i shall seek to not buy anymore clothes.    the panda bikini very cute right! haha. the nose is so strategically placed. but why the panda look so gloomy??   and this skirt from f21 is very cute. just that i dont know if xs will be too small. so i keep waiting till theres no more so i can tell myself orh too bad! haha. this is how i can curb my spending.  sometimes i wonder whether i am really too hard on myself. i know i am a very pessimistic person, and especially cynical after everything that has happened in my 22 years. there are some things i cant change and there are some things i dont want to dig up again. things that i want to put to rest and forget about but sometimes its not as easy to just pretend they nv happened or existed. its just like results slip. u can never change that B to an A. its fixed and written in black & white. on record. anyway just for record, i deleted all smses that no longer carry the same meaning. last week. and also those smses that i typed to myself when i was feeling really down. some had swear words like 'why do i fucking hell still care.' one last read and feeling like i wont be bothered if they dont exist in my hp. its a bunch of sweet memories that has no significance anymore. why wld u want to read a sms that says someone love u when he doesnt anymore? i am starting on a clean clean slate. anyhow there are other memories i will rmb him by. Amy Winehouse - back to black We only said good-bye with words I died a hundred times You go back to her And I go back to black goodbye or see you, I'll be your best kept secret or your biggest mistake. Labels: i have atrocious friends, The more we study the more we discover our ignorance. but ignorance is bliss so we should study more., whoever invented fashion committed an atrocious crime 0 wore their hearts on their sleeves Tuesday, April 22, 2008 5:32 PM
all the wonders i was surfing the net and i came across an interesting site: http://www.dear-god.net its for people to share their innermost hopes and fears through prayer, regardless of the kind of 'God' they believe in, or just a spiritual universal energy/higher power. its abit like a forum because people can reply to the posts. some of the posts are condescending la but there are also very touching and real ones a particular one i read was that the guy and his gf made a decision to abort an unplanned for baby and after the abortion, both of them are guilty and the guy cant bear to make love to her anymore and subsequently they broke up. and there were many replies; some people argued that its a logical decision since the baby would be 'unwanted' and they cant raise the baby anyway, while others said that they should forgive themselves for this and move on... hmm the topic about forgiving yourself if u do anything wrong. i think sometimes forgiving yourself is the most difficult thing to do; even if u receive others' forgiveness, u might still blame yourself. and there were other sentences i saw that made me wonder how true they are too. 1. if you can’t be with the one you love, love the one you’re with! sounds like settling for 2nd best. i wouldnt like to find out that my husband loves me because he cant be with someone else. 2. Its more important to grow in love than to fall in love. this one i really agree. because i think its easy to fall in love but maintaining it requires alot of work. 3. DO NOT MARRY FOR ANYTHING BUT ABSOLUTE LOVE i guess this is true too but maybe it shd be rephrased slightly. the most engaging reason to marry should be to marry because of love. if there is no love, then it would be hard to sustain a marriage in the 1st place. 4. What if we are sleeping and this world is just a dream? sometimes i wonder that. but i guess this world is too complex to just be a dream. even if it really is a dream, someone is staging this dream. 5. According to the APA sexual orientation is not a choice, and not something that can be changed thru therapy. Additionally it is totally natural and normal. i didnt know that. i always thought that being gay/homo was quite a 'new' thing that evolved because the world is turning crazy rather than something that is natural. maybe because i believe that men are made for women and vice versa. and peppermint tea tastes like wrigley's chewing gum. goodbye or see you, I'll be your best kept secret or your biggest mistake. Labels: why must we label everything? 0 wore their hearts on their sleeves Monday, April 21, 2008 5:23 PM
fab weekend i had a wonderfulll weekend! it was darling's birthday yesterday (HAPPY BIRTHDAY NOEL CHAN!!) and we spent a happy 2 days together; yesterday night was esp memorable :D we went ikea to walk walk and we had a very yummy dinner and i am glad that everything that i planned went quite smoothly the cakes turned out yummy, i managed to find the right baking tray and it was a memorable bday for him. all the lies i had to say, more lies to cover up the original lies, and everything else was worth it in e end to see him so stunned and happy. but really, its not alot that i did.. so, dont have to spend the next 4 mths stressing abt my bday okay? hahaha and a big thank you to siting, my accomplice, brainstormer and also the one who helped me carry out the ideas. :) i'll blog more tomorrow goodbye or see you, I'll be your best kept secret or your biggest mistake. Labels: birthdays, if love wasnt so atrocious I would have stayed blind 3 wore their hearts on their sleeves 5:20 PM
its a very interesting song. but was by grace jones originally. 0 wore their hearts on their sleeves 11:25 AM
Amy Winehouse - Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow lyrics 0 wore their hearts on their sleeves Friday, April 18, 2008 2:17 PM
a better friday everything's fine now and i got happy news my supervisor sufei just asked me when i am graduating and she said 'mo mo ren' asked her whether i am keen on this line of work aft i grad i dont know who mo mo ren is lah, hmm if i were to guess, it cld be someone big shot, like mark/leni.. but then why wld mark care abt a small intern haha.. but anyway i said yea its good but i still got 1 year to go... if only i cld grad immed haha i will be happy to join DB but theres still one year and after 1 year they might not want to hire anyone at that time and she said sth like yea theres still one year but at least the interest is there can work things out well i am really happy cuz it shows that i am not that bad an intern and they are actually willing to hire me back and i told her that i tot of extending my internship but i m gg TW for holidays and she said why not; can take leave what.. and chery said yea good she wants me to stay (haha, of cuz lah interns can help them do work!) sufei said i m opposite of eunice; cuz i wanna work while eunice wanna go back sch. haha its true so this conversation makes my day plus that day my friend told me they say my proposals are good :)) goodbye or see you, I'll be your best kept secret or your biggest mistake. Labels: a woman's work is never done 2 wore their hearts on their sleeves 11:34 AM
this is a very nice and sad song. i keep repeating it. its for people who leave you to go to another world. 0 wore their hearts on their sleeves 9:28 AM
blue friday a phone call didnt end right last night and so i went to sleep negative and woke up feeling very blue the same person who can make u happy is also the same person who can make you unhappy although its just a small matter that is nothing to conflict about but somehow it just became that way its just a misunderstanding things i cant be clear about yet all positive stuff comes with the negative bits what goes up must come down so maybe i shd start living on a flat surface no up nor down i dont like to feel this way at all goodbye or see you, I'll be your best kept secret or your biggest mistake. Labels: if love wasnt so atrocious I would have stayed blind 0 wore their hearts on their sleeves Thursday, April 17, 2008 5:40 PM
more random stuff    i think someone will be screaming... haha. the LV noe is quite nice too saw it in Urban today, its $1980. chanel really very expensive leh, its $4k and above. why huh? i always thought LV is more ex. but i thk chanel bags look nicer in the ads than in real life. haha. so if siting wants 5 chanel bags (and one less kid), its $20 k.. wow.    haha. interesting tees from david & goliath. i m too pretty to do mathsss... and spooning leads to forking... hahha.. its a nice one. the "i have enough friends, thanks" would be gd to send to those irritating people who try to add u on friendster. i am so tired today! had a dream abt the past yesterday but in the dream i said no. :) its unthinkable that i was feeling that way back then and today just a mere 2 mths later it all boils down to nothing. life must be lived forward but can only be understood backward; how true this is. goodbye or see you, I'll be your best kept secret or your biggest mistake. Labels: if love wasnt so atrocious I would have stayed blind, why must we label everything? 2 wore their hearts on their sleeves Wednesday, April 16, 2008 5:47 PM
super random stuff i found and they look either very yummy/beautiful/just eye-catching.       work is a bitch these days. time crawls. colleagues are annoying. or maybe because i am in lousy mood. blame it on my period. haha. oh well, at least i am meeting him for dinner. that's something to look forward to. and my bed tonight. goodbye or see you, I'll be your best kept secret or your biggest mistake. Labels: why must we label everything? 0 wore their hearts on their sleeves Monday, April 14, 2008 5:50 PM
the fallen i'm on mc today blocked nose and splitting headache and feeling like my body aches my colleagues very sweet johanna sms me to ask what happened, and zul also asked me to get well soon as he doesnt have anyone to annoy today. (so nice right! i sick he still thking of annoying me) spent most of the morning and afternoon sleeping later going to meet darling for dinner at amk! i hardly go amk one.. but hes prob very familiar with the area anyway, that day in hall i saw yewhong walking back to his room then it dawned upon me its prob the last time i will see him in hall made me alittle sad.. cuz i thk nx sem, if i get a room, hall will be quiet till u can hear a pin drop sigh.. my batch also left the few of us le.. plus i hope i can even get a room, the cut off pt so damn high if not pray tt siting gets her single rm. if not she move out also v sian if i get a room. of course best scenario is that all of us get a room. so that things dont change. and i am also sad that my roomie is leaving for japan, in just 2 weeks time i no GSS to go :( time flies.. i hope 3 mths will fly too so she'll be back no more instant phone call/sms updates what if big things happen!! haha. who will solve my dilemmas and help me thk of solutions if lets say i meet a rich, and hot man like erm, george clooney or whatshisname.. and he asks for my hand. hahaa.. crazy. i will miss mrs huuu :P who is huuu? and of course miss oh miss oh pls leave ur speaker phone w me so we can skype and rmb buy me jap notebook, send some jap porn to ppl like cheewee, and buy me exotic and pretty stuff from the land of sushi (no washabi pls) and rmb to update me hor!! lucky still have shuen and jiaen.. hehe.. also abt 3 weeks to shuen's arrival, whee.. and i hope my sister will get her 3.2k job, its time to change a new work env, and i thk she is underpaid at Arvato. if not other better job prospects would be nice too, so that she can treat me to kushinbo with her new 3.2k pay. wahaha. i got the flower bikini from the spree liao! its very nice and damn gd quality for the price. yay :) now for the weather to be sunny. i hate rainy weather!! and my TE dress and threadless tee also fabbbb. yeah to good buys. now is time for me to sell my stuff. kk better go bathe. if not i might get lost at amk deep deep (hahah it doesnt make any sense i know :D) goodbye or see you, I'll be your best kept secret or your biggest mistake. Labels: i have atrocious friends, whoever invented fashion committed an atrocious crime 0 wore their hearts on their sleeves Sunday, April 13, 2008 6:55 PM
yesterday and today i am feeling sleepy and drowsy! cant wait to go home and sleep feel like taking mc tml and just sleep the whole day since i am having flu anyway and i thk i dont have anything on tml its been a hectic 2 weeks, but also a happy 2 weeks we din do alot but we got to know each other very well and we are closer now :) my fav phrase in the past 2 weeks: i BOX u ar! hahaha its getting more real now, less surreal though sometimes it still seems too gd and i m too lucky if it really is a dream, dont wake me up yet give me 2 more mins! :D it is a very nice feeling to know that u are so special to somebody to hear that you are beautiful inside out... not perfect but yet that person chose you over others april 12 was yesterday, it came and went now it has another significance something i wont forget its surprising how things can change (somethings become insignificant and small; others become more important and weigh more) how some changes are irrevocable how things can never be the same how your mindset can change how the things that once were so impt to you are no longer impt but this is liberation and moving on theres only next time, no more last time goodbye or see you, I'll be your best kept secret or your biggest mistake. Labels: a woman's work is never done, if love wasnt so atrocious I would have stayed blind 0 wore their hearts on their sleeves Friday, April 11, 2008 2:29 PM
my foc days hahahha okay i dug out old photos and ermm circled people out looking at these photos i feel abit nostalgic i thk nx yr when i m gg to grad i will feel even sadder, time passes so fast! look at how much we have changed, hahahha.. i circled caddie, me, wenxin, and roland for all photos look at roland! he look like ah tiong back then. now.... he look like ah beng hahah *at least ah beng is singaporean k? he is so gonna kill me but its okay we all unglam tog wahahha  hermes outside hermes shop. we were quite hyped when we saw the shop haha.  this was before we went in to play paintball. i still remb me and caddie were like hiding cuz jason very skilled and he shoot everyone. and i rmb we played against lionel and jeanette. haha...  also circled sally out, my fav senior cuz she was very caring and nice when i fell out of initiation on 1st night. always rmb:) haha and also circled yi-de the most gd looking guy in hall 12 last time. I still have this memory of all of us playing games after foc ended in mpr, and the forfeit was to drink alot of water and we werent allowed to go toilet. but jason was very lousy he keep saying he cannot tahan so he ran to toilet hahahaha... damn funny. from that time till now, its 3 years? really amazing how time flies. i miss hermes. i miss being a freshie! and we were always chanting hermes tio herpes.. HAHAHA those were the days goodbye or see you, I'll be your best kept secret or your biggest mistake. Labels: i have atrocious friends 0 wore their hearts on their sleeves 11:05 AM
it's friday i'm in love it feels great to be able to get what you hanker for; after a long time. i just hope they turn out fine. i have some degree of normal mail phobia now, i try to do meetup. but i miss the feeling of receiving parcels in the mailbox and tearing them open. esp in hall with siting, we get that piece of paper from the hall office and we are super excited. then when we open it we will go either 'yay' or 'the material sucks.. damn sad!! okay nvm sell it' - i can totally hear siting's voice saying the 2nd one.. haaha. next sem k? :)   i was lucky and chanced upon some girl's blog. she din even say she wanted to sell but i just tried my luck. haha i guess never try, never know!  i have been looking for this threadless design for donkey years. i know its quite morbid looking but i m just fascinated with it. they ran out of print but i got it from another girl haha. but good news i just managed to track the lost mail! yeah. :) singpost is still gd! but everytime send to my hse sure lost somewhere.. its friday, and i was having friday blues, weird.. maybe cuz i m tired and sick! tomorrow is april 12th. used to think that it will affect me alot, that i will be very sad but i guess now it has just become another date. we would have been tog for 4 years if we din say goodbye. but its just memories now. its a buried past. 4 years is nothing, i got a 60 year contract to fulfill now :)) goodbye or see you, I'll be your best kept secret or your biggest mistake. Labels: i have atrocious friends, if love wasnt so atrocious I would have stayed blind, whoever invented fashion committed an atrocious crime 0 wore their hearts on their sleeves Thursday, April 10, 2008 1:51 PM
magnolia orange haha i just went lunch with zul and he said his 1st impression of me was that i had weird fashion sense (has he ever seen the real weird kind? the kind that works only when you see them in magazines or fashion runways.. or the gothic kind or cosplay.. thats weird on the streets) he said cause i always wear black (that day i wore minty green for his sake and he told me he dont rmb it!! waste my efforts haha) and my clothes have funny details/accessories i was like i dont rmb wearing anything funny on the 1st day at DB and that he and eric always think i wear weird stuff, thats not proper work wear. then i am like, but no one wears any proper work wear here! haha.. so of course i must adapt and chuck my formal office wear.. then he continued to say that i also looked dao! its really not my fault that i have a dao face! then he said haha u cannot work in PR... seriously i sometimes worry that i will lose out nx time when looking for a job cuz of my damn dao face! i should start smiling everytime i see strangers.. and then we were talking about men i said i like the sensible kind, planner/go-getter, know what they want, progressive, and cannot be possessive and needs to give me personal space. and i dont need handsome, muscular kind like those that can model CK underwear and he keep pointing out men to me; all the funny looking ones.. i like cute and cheeky hahaha.... reminds me of cst... erhem... but anyway it was a nice lunch! and my colleague ee sze left for her wedding/honeymoon in europe wont see her for 1 mth will miss her, she is very nice though at 1st i thought she's very strict haha... i will miss DB when i leave in 2 mths.. sigh... goodbye or see you, I'll be your best kept secret or your biggest mistake. Labels: a woman's work is never done, i have atrocious friends 0 wore their hearts on their sleeves 9:19 AM
its such a coincidence again, just like that time i blogged abt how i will react if he contacts me, and he suddenly did the next day and yesterday i was just saying how 'things happen' and then i woke up this morning and saw the ex's 2 smses he went 'u got bf already ah.. really congrats'. and the second one was asking if i was at home or at hall so i replied i was at home and he said i was avoiding his question.. (what question was there?? he already knows what!) then subsequently he asked me for this blog again, cuz he want to know whats gg on in my life, which i said no to and he said he want to meet me to talk face to face in hall i told him can talk on msn and he said 'u know hw i feel abt msn..' he wanted to talk about 'whats happening' (like huh?) and said 'remember we said tt we'll talk when we found someone new?' (i was thinking, u rmb any promise meh....) and he asked how long we are tog, how i know him, etc damn i forgot to just use two words, the words he used when i asked him back then - 'things happen'.. stupid me. really atrocious... then i said i am not gg back hall anytime soon then he went nvm la good luck seriously he shd change his friendster and stop being single, and take our photos down. i dont want others to misunderstand. but it is also through this incident that i realise how determined i can be.. i was just thinking 'i am happy now, can you please get out of my life' we can be friends but its not time yet and the tone he was using just reminds me of the last time he said 'dont bluff i can already know ur tots...' to me. pisses me off please dont act like we still really understand or know each other cuz i dont know u like before, and vice versa i have nothing to say to him just like he once said he has nth to say to me how time turns the tide maybe i am feeling this way because i still rmb what i went through goodbye or see you, I'll be your best kept secret or your biggest mistake. Labels: if love wasnt so atrocious I would have stayed blind 0 wore their hearts on their sleeves Wednesday, April 09, 2008 2:38 PM
what doesnt kill you makes you stronger my bf ditched me to go lib and i have finished my work, waiting for meeting to start. hence it was time to play with polyvore.com again    the louboutin shoes are freaking gorgeous and there's acty one pair that i own in the collage! anyone rmb? haha. its the hot pink sandals from gojane. more... i like the first top below... its from forever21, haha whats new.. and the topshop one is similar to something i have, except the bareback for this is just very hot...      i also realise that the dress on the right i bought is the same as the one on f21! hahah... fyi thats not me! i just cropped the girl's head off.. but i am acty wearing this today. and then i went to do this stupid test that will tell you how many bfs you will have before marriage... HAHAH..  i wasnt happy with the results.. 18 bfs??? that would prob mean i get married at 48 or something..  so i tried again HAHAH.. yay.. i can get married liao...... :D anyway i suddenly went to read some stuff i wrote b4 and i feel like i have really been through much shit. and for a bloody long time too. the things that the ex once said, so cruel, so unexpected and i was such a fool for not letting go when it was already clear that things have changed and his sparks for me have gone. i feel like as if someone blindfolded me for 6 months and i just blindly accepted everything and the things i wrote before abt my feelings really are shockingly deep. how could i ever thought i would never love someone else again, and as if he was the only only one who could understand me. i dont understand how i could have fell so hard back then. but now that blindfold has been removed. and i think i have learnt from it and become stronger. i know now what he meant when he told me 'things happen'. and i am glad things happened. i never imagined to have what i have today, and i have never felt more contended with my life than now, for the past 6 mths. now i feel like there's someone i am really concerned for, and i just want to do everything i can to make this person happy. wanting to put his happiness above mine and the feeling i get when i miss him is annoyingly indescribable. and i will get very bothered if he's upset with me. i cant predict the future, but i will put in 100%. u know who u are, and what i told u that day:) je t'aime, darling Signing off, i'll be your best kept secret Labels: if love wasnt so atrocious I would have stayed blind, whoever invented fashion committed an atrocious crime 0 wore their hearts on their sleeves Tuesday, April 08, 2008 6:05 PM
i'm feeling on top of the world  i saw this shirt online and the 1st person i thought of was david quek, cuz he was the one who started saying i m very random.. and then subsequently i realised more people also said that. haha he asked me to print this shirt and wear it!! siting and i had a msn conversation abt the names we want to give to our children. i said meredith and chloe are nice for a girl, and she wanted roxanne and alethia (which i said sounded like a little/litre) and keith for a boy. then we started saying lame stuff like chanel and chanelle.. [Sitting Duck]: abcdEfghIjkLmnOpqrstUVwxyz says (11:50 AM): hahah yeah i def will be a funky mother [Sitting Duck]: abcdEfghIjkLmnOpqrstUVwxyz says (11:50 AM): but kids ex lei [Sitting Duck]: abcdEfghIjkLmnOpqrstUVwxyz says (11:50 AM): i rather have one kid less and 5 more chanel bags 我在这里计算终点的距离 下一站有没有更期待的结局。 I'll be your best kept secret. says (2:58 PM): i use chloe 我在这里计算终点的距离 下一站有没有更期待的结局。 I'll be your best kept secret. says (2:59 PM): let u use chanel 我在这里计算终点的距离 下一站有没有更期待的结局。 I'll be your best kept secret. says (2:59 PM): den chanel n chloe can b best frens 我在这里计算终点的距离 下一站有没有更期待的结局。 I'll be your best kept secret. says (2:59 PM): hahaha 我在这里计算终点的距离 下一站有没有更期待的结局。 I'll be your best kept secret. says (2:59 PM): den my son can b charles 我在这里计算终点的距离 下一站有没有更期待的结局。 I'll be your best kept secret. says (2:59 PM): urs be keith 我在这里计算终点的距离 下一站有没有更期待的结局。 I'll be your best kept secret. says (2:59 PM): tog we form CHARLES & KEITH! its super lame. hahaha..shuen, this reminds me of the 10% red dot boots and our insistence to be the last 2 customers that time. haha. its less than 1 month before i get to see you again, what time is ur flight? maybe i can go pick u up:) rmb u said i can be the 1st to book you one leh! we must go C&K okay? [Sitting Duck]: abcdEfghIjkLmnOpqrstUVwxyz says (5:16 PM): tts y i think ur weird and seriously, am i really weird? why sometimes i think of something a certain way but no1 seems to understand or agree, then the only reason i can give is "erm, i m weird lor" hahaha... oh i got something to mention! i got to drive my fav car that day!! mazda 3... :) last time i drove was for wenxin's 21st, haha. i feel really surprised that u asked me to drive. thank u baby. u know i am starting to think the same way, that everything is too good to be true. i am a little afraid of waking up and realizing that these are just bubbles that will pop. i am almost afraid to promise too much or think too far into the future because its all still kind of surreal. for the past one week since april fool, i have been feeling so happy, and i seem to be waiting, waiting for something negative so that i would be a little less happy, maybe cuz being so happy, it scares me alittle as i know how it feels like when happiness is taken away. sometimes i wonder if i should give this more space, or is that just my excuse cuz i m holding back. it is not an easy question to answer. maybe i should just concentrate on being happy. one week and i hope i will still be counting :) goodbye or see you, I'll be your best kept secret or your biggest mistake. Labels: i have atrocious friends, if love wasnt so atrocious I would have stayed blind 3 wore their hearts on their sleeves Thursday, April 03, 2008 10:24 AM
happy April's fool things happen when you least expect them to. i said it that day, and i was proven right. :) all i can say is that i am really happy, and it was beyond my imagination. it just feels right. and i saw a couple having sex on adm rooftop yesterday night, like omgosh, it was so erm, sexciting. hahaha... didnt ever thought i will actually have to sit there and watch live sex. the funny thing was they seem to ignore us but then 3 people walked past they hurriedly throw their clothes on, while those 3 ppl suddenly accelerated their walking speed. haha. i saw this really funny sentence today. nobody dies a virgin because in the end, life fucks us all. goodbye or see you, I'll be your best kept secret or your biggest mistake. Labels: if love wasnt so atrocious I would have stayed blind, why must we label everything? 0 wore their hearts on their sleeves Tuesday, April 01, 2008 11:42 AM
who's the fool? my roomie tried to fool me today that she is attached but too bad I m very smart saw through her instantly hahahha.. so not convincing. plus my mummy told my sister to tell me this morning that its april fool today so dont get fooled. haha. i dont know why she she funny. and at work, eunice and i were emailing... Eunice: My eyes really painful.. I think I squashed it when I sleep ytd.. Now cannot see clearly! Me: Hw u squash Eunice: As in I slept so soundly on my left side and my eyes is like half squashed den coz so soundly I didn’t turn over and so whole nite my eye was in under that pressure.. So when I woke up today its like out of shape le maybe end of the day den will be better hopefully soon... Seriously how can the eye be squashed??????!! And I thought I was weird, I think my friends are weird too. or maybe they got my influence. heh. hmm, things are clearer now. and its a nice feeling cause i don't like uncertainty or trying to second guess. i just haven't pushed myself to take the leap of faith. but i think it might just happen naturally without me having to convince myself. it just feels abit weird that everything is happening in march/april.. i hadn't anticipated these, not even in the next few months, but i guess thats what they meant by things happen when you least expect them to. although this means that suddenly i have to wire my mindset and change my lifestyle.. a bit not used and somehow forgotten what seems to be the 'right' way to do things. and barely settled into my new life, i seem to be stepping into yet another new phase. i think the dilemma is that i am very contented and happy with my life now. hence i am afraid to lose what i have while allowing room for new changes. not saying new changes are bad ones, but sometimes changes are hard. we'll see... goodbye or see you, Labels: i have atrocious friends, if love wasnt so atrocious I would have stayed blind 0 wore their hearts on their sleeves |
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