a moment to remember

~songs in my head~

没有地球太阳还是会绕.

But I don’t care what they say. I’m in love with you.

I just wanna fall and lose myself Laughing so hard it hurts like hell Forget about everything and run away, yeah

~ MOTTO ~
:: if you have tried your best, there's no need for regrets. ::

~ THOUGHTS ~
By ourselves we are too weak to hold our own even for a moment.

"And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God" (Romans 8:28)

For what it's worth, it was worth all the while.

"God has given, God has taken, blessed be the name of God" (Job 1:21)

"I know what I’m doing. I have it all planned out – plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for.” (Jeremiah 29:11)

Hit Counters

:: juz taking a moment to remember ::

Saturday, September 22, 2007 8:22 PM

Saturday night alone at home

I'm super bored, and feeling restless
hungry but no one to eat with
Spending saturday at this time alone at home...
is so not like my schedule
it makes me realise,
how dependent i have allowed myself to be
and it makes me scared
when i think of spending all my saturdays like this

i need to study
but, i dont know
next sem will be internship already
soon i will be graduating and have to pay off my debts
i think i should start planning more for the future
rather than keep living for the moment
here i am, 21, but none the wiser
what would my first job be?
where would it be?
how much would i earn?
i wish i knew...

i'm just putting on a strong front, 自欺欺人。。。
i want to remember the old days, but even more so, i want the days ahead to have reasons for me to remember them too..

Signing off,
no more ink.

Labels: growing up

0 wore their hearts on their sleeves

Thursday, September 20, 2007 3:58 AM

not all tears are in vain

i cried today, but i feel very happy
it really made my day or even my entire week
i <3 face="times new roman">miss you lots!

your birthday present came 1 month plus late, but i was really very surprised
when the lady walked out with this huge parcel that i wasnt even expecting
and then i saw your name and handwriting
i was feeling so happy and high
when i ripped it open at the post office...
i felt like crying
and then i read your letter, you talked about our days in JC, from copying my logbook to eating at the crow-infested canteen, i just couldnt stop crying...
i just miss you so much
and even now, when i think back to that moment at the post office
i felt like it was so long since i last saw you at the airport
but yet its not even 1 year...
thank u rachel for remembering.. and bothering to send me something..
the postage is very expensive from US to SG as it is from SG to US!
thank you for buying me f21 stuff! :)
and the bag is very nice.
but most of all, i love your card.
because of a sentence you wrote, which is very meaningful
i quote "We are all growing up and doing different things but this part of my life I will hold dear..."
that is so so true and i will hold dear our friendship too even though we are miles apart
and with the memories of before, and the hope of seeing you again in future
i shall say to you
you've made a difference in my life
i so wished i could go out with you stil, and go take neoprints do stupid "copy-and-paste" faces and doodle on the machine...
thank you rachel...

Signing off,
no more ink.

Labels: birthdays, i have atrocious friends

0 wore their hearts on their sleeves

Tuesday, September 18, 2007 5:40 PM

random thoughts

you have what's called preconceived notions of the truth
and if you believe anything hard enough, it is fixed in your mind as the truth
and then if ten people hear and believe the same thing, it becomes the absolute truth
and 'truth' can happen behind your back

one example will be
a wife thinks her husband is having an affair cuz he comes home very late daily (preconceived notion)
she thinks about it everyday and the idea that he is having an affair becomes fixated as the truth
she talks to her friends and ask them for their opinions
they agree and suggest he could really be having an affair
and then it becomes the absolute truth that the husband is having an affair
and so the wife files for divorce, the husband is shocked
this is called the 'truth' happening behind the husband's back

a communications studies student comes up with a truth theory. but probably someone else have already thought of this before

anyway i bought a new hp. very pretty i love it. sad about my old phone, not being able to really use it anymore. but i guess we all have to move on. flip phone + nokia = old dream
come true

as for all other matters, i guess time will tell lah.
i think i am starting to have this "if its meant to be, its meant to be" attitude too
because i just cant live on fretting over stuff that have changed
circumstances change people's behavior and reactions i must admit
no point crying over split milk..
and maybe if i keep myself busy enough i have less troubles

and recently i realised how vicious people in hall can be...
its pretty sad to see everybody shooting down someone...
badmouthing them, not giving them even the benefit of doubt (a lesson my primary school form teacher imparted to me, i guess)
and to think we all used to be so good together
another example of having to move on in life
and sometimes it gets me thinking what are others saying behind my back to each other
humans are just so unreliable
and it surprises me how others dont really know me, and they have to ask me things that are so obvious..

i think i am just better off trusting myself

Signing off,
no more ink.

Labels: growing up, why must we label everything?

0 wore their hearts on their sleeves

Wednesday, September 12, 2007 7:29 PM

爱呢 by S.H.E

爱呢
爱呢我们的爱呢
你在怀里藏什么
挤得抱不紧
我在你胸口找温柔
只找到一片沙漠
没有蝗的笑容
没有温度的手
慢慢倾斜的天空
一片一片哦～～
正迅速压垮着我

爱呢
爱呢你的爱呢
你呢
你呢我的你呢
从前的
从前的那些快乐
变了
变了没了
难道你真舍得
真舍不得
心呢被弄痛了
承诺呢被丢弃了
我的爱呢
你把它给谁了

你在回味什么
嘴唇没空吻我
想再听你说爱我
只听到一阵沉默
是不是我迷了路
走进别人的梦中
原本熟悉的亲密
变成陌生的问候

知道世界很善变
没想到连你也变
我好怀念你刚开始爱上我的那天

这首歌完全唱出我心里的话。。。

Signing off,
no more ink.

Labels: why must we label everything?

0 wore their hearts on their sleeves

5:47 PM

if only things were going my way

Matter 1:
I think I have just been hit by the seriousness of some stuff.
I will try my very best to stop and change
I must think more for the future, and stop living in the present.

Matter 2:
Also I think I need to reconfigure myself
Maybe stop being so affected by stuff
Or maybe learn to not care at all
And learn to be like, super independent
I used to do it, why can't I now, right?

It hurts like hell to see things this way
When I so never imagined things would turn out to be so
Maybe I have lost the confidence in things
And maybe I will not believe anymore if this ends

My head is spinning
My nose is running
It just doesnt make sense to go either way
Can I look into the future
Can I take a rest on someone's dependable shoulders?
Sometimes its so hard to open up to others,
Things just feel so private
And others wont understand the implications

I don't want it to
But is it just not meant to be,
And for me to find out after so long,
Reality can be really harsh

Signing off,
no more ink.

Labels: growing up, if love wasnt so atrocious I would have stayed blind

0 wore their hearts on their sleeves

Tuesday, September 11, 2007 8:39 PM

quick update

i shall not touch chicken rice (at least in ntu) for very long, or ever again..
after eating can B chicken rice yesterday, i felt sharp pain in my stomach, had to leave my project mates doing the SPSS thingy (feel so bad) and came back to sleep.
after i woke up feeling weak i went to toilet and vomitted 3 times at night... all i did was sleep sleep sleep and had to skip all my lessons and project again today.

and i am still feeling not so good now.. hope i will recover by tomorrow man. still have 830 class.. haiz.. and i haven done my assignment due on friday! how!?? i really have phobia of chicken rice liao lah!

anyway, last tues foc main comm treat was super GOOD. even tho now my stomach is not good, i can still imagine the sashimi in my mouth -_- the amount of sashimi there was like ..... dunno how many salmons lah!! haha.. and the most -_- thing that happened (okay theres two, now that i remember):

1st incident - we were waiting at the bus stop to go to the hotel and then i was talking to kyon and dont know why i kinda shifted and bumped into 'someone' so i said sorry and turned around as i said it. turns out that i just bumped into a pole at the bus stop!! but it really felt like someone's shoulder or what mah, so its only right to say sorry first right. kyon never failed to remind me of my chou shi that night lah.. he keep pretending to say sorry to some object!! grrr.. pai seh lah

then 2nd incident:
i wanted to order more tako sashimi, so i asked who wanted, then alot of them say i want i want!! then i thought wah got so many people like to eat this too?? and then when it came no1 touch it, then i asked them why they never eat...

hongda's answer sums up what everyone wanted to say:
'oh.. i thought you asking tako PACHI' --- almost fell off my seat... lol..

and that dinner was super full, and the green tea ice cream flown from japan was yummy, the sake was so-so.. but everything was wonderful.. and the dinner i supposed, marked the end of the foc, and the end of our main comm meetings.. kinda sad in a way, but i dont feel as sad as last year lah.. mayb i have no time to think, or those feelings will only come if i join nx yr foc again. haha.. but still, i will miss everyone in the comm... and i think foc was quite well done, but this of course has to do with the fact that this year's freshies are pretty loud and on.. i still love foc, and i think its the most fun activity in hall... i just wished i am still the freshie hahaha..

cheers to the foc main comm!!

Signing off,
no more ink.

0 wore their hearts on their sleeves

Sunday, September 02, 2007 4:43 PM

i was lucky again!!

yesterday at dnd, i won the lucky draw!!!!!
wheeeeeeee
2nd time at dnd leh..... hehe...
its a $80 takashimaya voucher, or rather 8 $10 vouchers
anyway i actually remembered my number wrongly
in the last entry i said it was 12 right?
and halfway through dnd, i saw ben and asked if he will be one of those to draw the numbers out, and i said 'call number 12 okay' jokingly.. haha..
den while we were eating our sago dessert,
i heard the emcee say zero........ one......... zero....... (010)
i didnt immediately realise its me
i just took my ticket and look at the number (which was printed pretty small) and i was like 'eh i am 010??'
so i went on stage to collect my vouchers.
no shout or scream like last year..(just stumbled on my own bag when i wanted to pull my chair back to get up lah)
lucky HAHA!
still remember last year i must have sounded like those who have never won lucky draws or has just won the 1st prize in toto.. (but mayb it was really first time winning lucky draw? cant rmb)

so dnd was FUN! hahaha just cuz i won the lucky draw rite? no la this year i quite enjoy the pageant but why no bikini show? but ok lah got guys to ogle at, cuz this year better than my batch, which was flabby/bones.. (oops, roland i m not refering to u)..... HAHA
and i was damn happy cuz my predictions for hall king and hall queen came true la!!
weixiang and jing ying.. haha too bad for stella and wx who wanted M4 eric to win...... and stella actually bei eric dian dao when he catwalk down and pointed to the crowd.. haha... then ruifang say 'wah stella u mesermerised by him liao' hahahah....... note the word mesermerised okay!! me and stella was luffing lyk mad...

and of cuz most of us were happy that the supposedly hot favorite girl didnt win.. its just like cheerleading competition, we dont wan hall 13 to win, so as long as they dont win, we will cheer for any other winners.. haha so this is the same.. out to win, but too bad jing ying got it.. shes more friendly, pretty and can dance so hot la... but she nid to be more *demure* la, she actually did an unmentionable thing infront of me and all other people when i was talking to her.. ahhaha.. but then we now have a NEW hall queen, hooray for the NEW hall queen.... finally the NEW hall queen will be the one basked in the glory and wears the BIGGER crown.. and i just cannot forget siting's expression last nite hilarious.....

actually alot o people came in very nice costumes last night... alot of daring ones too and sandar/hongda came as sailor moon... (she went on stage and proclaimed she was hongda lor!) i think my favorite costume would be the mermaid.. (pei jun).. its a very special and pretty costume.. and only yest did i realise she is tog with leon cai.. acty i thk siting told me b4 but it didnt sank in that time cuz i only vaguely rmb them that time.. -_-

and the 2nd nicest costume in my opinion is tinkerbell aka SHUWAN!!!! wheeeeeee.. i think u really suit the costume leh, maybe cuz of the green color.. and tt u are small size, but i tot u looked nice in it :) but why u remove ur wings during dinner? haha... *cold joke upcoming* -- cuz u know u cannot escape from the sponsors table right? so u took off your wings in resignation.. haha..

oh and this freshie that came as snow white (she's sandar's roomie) really looked like she is the real snow white (except with long hair la) cuz her hair is jet black.. haha.. and martin went as geisha la! omg.... and he won the top prize $500 cold hard cash from prof foo!!! super lucky!! and emily came as a japanese soldier with a gun tt really makes noise.. super cute!

let me think of a third costume that is the nicest... i know! its stella's.. and hers is not even costume lor, its just her own clothes.. but very pretty :) i love her topman hat, and her vest.... and she looks like those casino card dealer girl (okay not the bunny kind, but i think she can pull it off.. haha).. but those more professional and NOT slutty kind..... i want to kope her hat one day... stella we exchange wardrobe lah ok.... haha

ok i shall post more soon..

Signing off,
no more ink.

Labels: whoever invented fashion committed an atrocious crime, why must we label everything?

0 wore their hearts on their sleeves

Saturday, September 01, 2007 10:16 AM

a short-lived dream

i just had a wonderful dream
very vivid very real
but dreams are only dreams
and moreover i am not sure i want it to come true

today's DND.. but i am still sick. sigh. one week liao!
hope that it will be fun.
but actually i dont think it will be very fun.
i remember not really watching the pageant last year cuz the seat not good
well mayb it will be more fun this year
and lucky draw!! call my number again this year hehe...
number 12!

i guess at least we get to take pics.. will be fun...

Signing off,
no more ink.

Labels: dreams, why must we label everything?

0 wore their hearts on their sleeves

on repeat mode

Leona Lewis Lyrics

mine

abandoned blog I
abandoned blog II

the past