~songs in my head~
没有地球太阳还是会绕.But I don’t care what they say. I’m in love with you. I just wanna fall and lose myself Laughing so hard it hurts like hell Forget about everything and run away, yeah ~ MOTTO ~ :: if you have tried your best, there's no need for regrets. :: ~ THOUGHTS ~ By ourselves we are too weak to hold our own even for a moment. "And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God" (Romans 8:28) For what it's worth, it was worth all the while. "God has given, God has taken, blessed be the name of God" (Job 1:21) "I know what I’m doing. I have it all planned out – plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for.” (Jeremiah 29:11) Hit Counters |
:: juz taking a moment to remember ::
Sunday, August 06, 2006 1:01 PM
facing a whole lot o things and trying to move on. it felt so awful to not feel happy when foc ended. even more horrible to cry alone in the room when everyone else went for celebration. yet i believe i made a right and lucky decision not to go with everyone else. cause things went better than i cld ever ever hoped for at that moment. and i hope things are going to get better as we try to forget and move on. and after 5 days of fluctuating moods, here i wanna apologize to anyone, everyone, esp my dearest main comm friends, sorry for my mood swings.. sometimes i got v high and laughed alot (and thanks to u all, that did helped me become happier for just awhile), other times (which cld be 5 mins aft my 'high tide') i sank into quiet and loner mood. all i can say is sometimes i was just tolerating and tolerating, so my quiet self was to prevent myself from exploding. there were so many things that contributed to my moods besides my problems.. such as foc programs not running smoothly, some communication misunderstanding b/w pple, pms, my hp spoiling (spoilt & gone now).. etc.. so it was kinda a lousy week for me.. and tho i cant say i enjoyed the camp like how a freshie would, i don regret joining foc as a acp.. it taught me how to work with others, and how to react quickly cuz murphy's law is such that things can always go wrong, and they do. so programs that u planned in a certain way will change, and one must be flexible enuff to go along. luckily for me, there were no major screw ups for campus race and NG100s and games.. and luckily for all of us, there were no thunderstorm rain to disrupt fright nite, and beach games etc.. tho war games was moved inside due to wet weather, but it still was a success.. yet now i have so much feelings inside me.. feeling like i wished i cld be a freshie again and enjoy the camp (and seeing the freshies in the camp cheering and all tt reminds me of Hermes.. now hermes is gone.. sob..) and feeling like i wished the 5 days cld come back again.. tho it wasnt a good week for me, i wished it cld slow down cuz its like.. now i wont get to do things like checking log list, eating in seminar room, etc.. MPR and seminar room bcame rooms i frequent and stayed longer than my own room lor.. i developed feelings for places and people.. so suddenly i am reluctant to let my main comm friends go.. as in (ahaa.. this brings back memories of alvin keep saying my kou tou chang was 'as in', and say i always 'as in as in' nonstop) now after the foc, we wont have any excuse to contact one another anymore.. and its like a breakup like tt.. so sad.. no more foc related topics.. seeing them cld become a hi-and-bye business. and of cuz sad that jiahong and jieming wont be in hall le.. and everyone will get busy with school again.. i do feel like joining foc again, cuz i thk out of all the activities, foc is the greatest and biggest of all.. it will make or break the impression that freshies have of hall 12.. but i m nt sure wat i will join.. prob not programmer again.. its quite sian to thk of all the programs again, and its quite sian when u execute it, u got nth else to do but oversee everyting.. hmm.. btw, i got a new hp.. cuz my samsung E630C really cui.. cant even on lor on friday.. i was also sad cuz of that..cuz there were really so many so many photos, voice clips, even calendar notes of my driving lessons schedule.. so many of my memories for the past 1 and a half years.. haiz.. cant believe that i cant keep tt phone as a keepsake. duno why when i brought it out to trade in, it cld be on lor.. and functioned normally.. so lucky! thank God!! haha.. must be God helping me to save $$..cuz i trade in that for $60.. nt bad la.. considering its state.. anyway, cuz i m having financial crisis haha, i only buy the cheapest phone.. okay la, cheapest was motorola L6 for $0.. i meant i din buy those newest model.. i bought sony ericsson k750i.. quite old i thk.. but its not a bad phone.. so ironic cuz i said i will nv use or buy a ericsson phone ever again after 2002. well, lucky sony came to save ericsson.. hope everything will be clear and smooth for me soon.. turning 20 soon, i dont wish to bring all these troubles with me..if not cannot remain sweet 16.. awww.. *got nao ai* Signing off, no more ink. 0 wore their hearts on their sleeves <$BlogItemCommentCount$> Comments:<$BlogCommentBody$> By <$BlogCommentAuthor$>, at <$BlogCommentDateTime$> <$BlogCommentDeleteIcon$> |
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