~songs in my head~
没有地球太阳还是会绕.But I don’t care what they say. I’m in love with you. I just wanna fall and lose myself Laughing so hard it hurts like hell Forget about everything and run away, yeah ~ MOTTO ~ :: if you have tried your best, there's no need for regrets. :: ~ THOUGHTS ~ By ourselves we are too weak to hold our own even for a moment. "And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God" (Romans 8:28) For what it's worth, it was worth all the while. "God has given, God has taken, blessed be the name of God" (Job 1:21) "I know what I’m doing. I have it all planned out – plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for.” (Jeremiah 29:11) Hit Counters |
:: juz taking a moment to remember ::
Wednesday, July 05, 2006 2:16 PM
a look into the far future and the not-so-distant future I want to ... name my children ethan and faith I want to... drive a Hyundai car I want to... get London the golden retriever I want to... live in Bishan or Yio Chu Kang or someplace more sururban I want to... live in a condo so I can go swimming whenever I like I want to... travel ard the world and go to these countries: Australia, Japan, France (PARIS!!), Korea, England, Spain, Hongkong, USA, New Zealand.. best if I can become an air stewardless lah. Den free travel man.. haha. I want to... see snow falling on my face I want to... warm up infront of a real chimney fire I want to... see Mt fuji infront of me and the Eiffel Tower and go Disneyland and the blue-green beaches of Australia (for the above, I need and thus want to earn big bucks, or find a rich man. Hahaha) I want to... write/research for a magazine I want to... collect many sunglasses, watches, perfumes, shoes and ermm lingerie.. haha.. a woman cant have too much of these.. hmm actually that is quite a lot tho.. I want to... be always youthful looking I want to... go on a cruise this year end I want to... go summer school in HK I want to... think of someway to celebrate being 21st next year (I know, this year is not even over and I m thinking abt next Aug oready haha – but shit 21 sounds so old can.. I will be eligible for all types of movies le.. no more anticipation!) I want to... sleep a lot a lot I think I am falling sick. My throat is very dry and itchy. Keep having to clear my throat. But I only had 2 pieces of durian today. Damn. Fast effect. :( Hmm.. had a dream. And felt as if I slpt for so long morning and light wld nv come. Woke at 3am to shut down my computer wic I left on to charge my ipod.. the details of pre-midnite seemed v hazy. Anw, the dream.. I saw a lot of my frens.. there was someone who kept disappearing in my dream these days.. hmmm.. kinda similar to dreams i had of andy last time.. whr i noe tt person is in d dream but he doesnt appear at all.. or is v distant.. maybe of wat happened these days ba.. also gt other frens suddenly appear like eddie! Haha.. he is one of those ppl whom I thk will disappear permanently fr my life.. those u just lose contact and no1 else really has their contacts either. Hmm.. kinda weird but who noes.. the next time I see him mite be like 20 yrs later.. always wonder wat will happen to each of ur frens.. and the lives they will lead.. when u all are in sec tog, all of u seem to be v common n will have common, similar futures. But as I get older, I realize how untrue, not to add naive, that is. Many of my friends have already taken paths that we din even predicted nor discussed or planned for way back then. Each of us has a diff path to take, and these paths dont seem like they will cross anymore. Kinda sad. This leads to me wondering whether I should be truthful abt my feelings anot. I cannot imagine what will happen and I cant imagine also how am I going to find the courage and words to tell some people some things that have been on my mind since last sem.. I sorta promised myself that in this holidays I will say it out, but now I find that its still not easy to get them out. Nowadays I just find myself shutting up or keeping silent when I am supposed to talk, cuz it seems like I always get cut off. As if wat I have to say is nth interesting. Must be retribution cuz I interrupt baby often too. Haha. :P but theres a difference between cutting off some1 cuz u dont wan listen and cuz u are too excited abt wat u wan to say. The latter is not intentional nor malicious. I get carried away sometimes. Maybe that person does also. I dunno. But that person had the most patience to listen to me in d past. Nowadays our conversations seem so hurried like theres no time for me. what do i do? i just shut up. i more or less find myself shutting up and keeping things to myself more le. i used to confide my problems with ease, now i always hesitate and thk it wont make a diff to say them out. so I shut up. Quite a lot of shut up in one paragraph.. i keep thinking will the truth really spill out on its own one of these days? when i cannot convince myself anymore? the urge to be honest is so strong.. but the consequences are unimaginable.. it feels awful to hide things. i wish i cld erase things. i guess its true that its dangerous when one gets drunk. haha.. but for me, it shd be when i get sleepy.. i start to blab nonsense.. maybe its time for me to let go and forgive and forget. Haha. I better clear up all the mess b4 school reopens. Hmm 3 more weeks b4 FOC. Fast. abit unwilling yet excited. Signing off, no more ink. 0 wore their hearts on their sleeves <$BlogItemCommentCount$> Comments:<$BlogCommentBody$> By <$BlogCommentAuthor$>, at <$BlogCommentDateTime$> <$BlogCommentDeleteIcon$> |
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